Plan an Awesome 2023: A 5-Step Plan
While you don’t have to wait for a birthday, a milestone, or a new year to set goals or make changes in your life, there is something about those moments that provide an opportunity for reflection, contemplation and planning.
The start of a new year presents the perfect opportunity to do just that.
Over the past decade, I’ve been working hard to align how I actually live with how I want to live. Turns out, that is more difficult than it sounds. Against the backdrop of society, media and other people’s expectations, developing clarity on what is most important to you and how you want to live your life is hard. And once you’ve found that clarity, preventing the daily whirlwind of life from pulling you off course is hard too.
The best way I have found to stay on track is to set a clear course, because, as Yogi Berra famously said, “if you don’t know where you are going, you are likely to end up someplace else.”
It starts with my five-step start-of-year planning. A blueprint, if you will, that lays the groundwork for a fantastic year.
Before you dig in, you should know three things.
First, this will take some time. Mostly thinking time. I suggest you do some of that thinking while you are walking because that is when your brain will be working at its best and you are likely to be free from distractions. But – and this important – as soon as you get back from that walk, sit down with a piece of paper (or better yet, your 2023 notebook) and capture your thoughts, ‘cause no matter how insightful, brilliant or mission-critical those insights are, you are likely to forget them if you don’t capture them quickly.
Second, this is a work-in-progress. It is okay – better than okay – if some of the things you settle on change over the course of the year. It is perfectly fine to adjust your course as you go. The decisions and choices you make now are not carved in stone, but nor are they written in pencil. Write them in pen, commit but remain open to growth, change and evolution.
Finally, while you don’t need any special tools and there is no magical year-end planner that is the key to unlocking the life you want, you do need a specific place to capture your thoughts, make your plans and track them over the course of the coming year. I like a medium-sized spiral notebook.
Okay, with that, let’s get started on the five elements of fantastic new year planning.
1. Dream Life
Several years ago, I spent several days thinking hard about what my dream life would look like. Where would I live? How would I spend my time? What would I do for work and for fun? How would I feel? What would I eat?
I journaled a bit about it – something I don’t typically do, but it helped on that occasion – and ultimately was able to turn that vision for my dream life into 10 specific elements. While my dream life is very personal and yours will absolutely be different, I’ll share four things on my list ‘cause maybe that will help get your mind going:
In my dream life, I spent lots of time hanging and traveling with Eric and our kids.
In my dream life, I ski 30 days a year and I swim in the ocean or bay 30 days a year.
In my dream life, I write, lead and inspire others to chase their dreams and live their fullest life.
In my dream life, I eat piles of fresh vegetables that someone else prepares.
If you don’t know what your dream life looks like, that’s okay, Just get started. Identify a few things and write them down. Maybe in your dream life, you walk in the woods most days. Maybe in your dream life, you bake bread, knit or host an annual New Year’s Day party. Maybe in your dream life you are part of a group of six women who travel together once a year.
Maybe … and here’s the incredible and empowering part … you get to decide. So go ahead, ask yourself … What does the dream life look like?
2. 3-by-3
Most people’s brains like to process in threes. At least, mine does. So a few years ago, at the start of the year, I added my 3-by-3 to my start-of-year planning:
Three things I want to do less of in the coming year;
Three things I want to do more of in the coming year; and
Three things I want to stop worrying about in the coming year.
The last one – three things I want to stop worrying about – is important for me. I was raised by a worrier and so the draw of rumination and worry is embedded deep and I have to do the work to distinguish between worry about things that I should think about because I can take action on them and things that are just worries. The third element of your 3-by-3 might be different, and that’s okay.
Avoid the temptation to use your 3-by3 to draw a line in the sand. This is not the time to tell yourself you are going to give up sugar forever, exercise every single day no matter what, or never snap at your children. It is your chance to set an intention around three things you want more of and three things you want less of. That’s it.
3. Fun List
For the past few years, one of the things that has shown up on my 3-by-3 is a desire to have more fun. I look at the importance of fun in two ways.
On the one hand, there is plenty of research that shows that fun is not frivolous and that people who have more fun are more productive. They lead better, they accomplish more and they tend to be happier. They have deeper connections with others, which is one of the markers for a long and happy life. So, if you need to justify your fun, you can justify it by telling yourself that having fun will actually boost your productivity and performance.
But on the other hand, I think we are all entitled to have more fun because … we are all entitled to have more fun. Life deserves to be savored and enjoyed. It is okay – better than okay – for us to choose to have more fun simply because it is fun.
In my very busy, overstuffed life (“stop overstuffing my days” is on my list of things I want to do less of), not only do I sometimes forget to have fun, but I forget what is actually fun for me. So I have created a list of activities, hobbies and pursuits that are fun. They include everything from skiing, skating and surfing, to what is fun for me at work – including leading, writing, brainstorming with the team and checking things off my to-do list (I know, that doesn’t sound like fun, but what can I say, it is for me).
What is on your fun list? Write it down.
4. Two Guiding Principles for the Coming Year
Next, I set two guiding principles for the coming year. Two overarching things or themes that I want to strive to do and live by. Last year, my two guiding principles were:
Build habits, routines and rituals to automate and simplify as much of my life as possible.
More adventure, more space and more fun.
For one of my dear friends, her guiding principle was “the hustle is canceled” while another added “progress over perfection” and Eric has declared that 2023 is the year to “see it through.”
I encourage you to think about what you need in this coming year. Do you need to be busier or less busy? Do you need your life to be simpler or richer? Do you need to focus on your health, your relationships or both? Is there a quote or a concept that can be your North Star for the coming year?
It is okay if your two guiding principles relate to your 3-by-3. For instance, on my 3-by-3 was a desire to do less overstuffing of my days and one way to do that was to build habits, routines and rituals to automate and simplify as much of my life as possible.
5. Finally, the Goals
The specific goals I set for the year must drive to the life I want, so I can’t set them until I’ve done all the other reflecting, thinking and planning. But once I have clarity on the life I want, then I can set specific, actionable, measurable goals. I set no less than three and no more than six. Your number might be different. Whatever works for you, works.
Remember, goals should be specific, achievable yet ambitious and, most importantly, only things you really, really want ‘cause goal crushing is hard.
Last But Not Least: The Most Important Part
The most important part: write this plan down and review it regularly (preferably at the start of each and every month) to be sure that you are correctly aligning your time and energy. If something has changed – if element number 4 of your dream life no longer calls to you, if you realize that surfing is actually more scary than it is fun, if a goal needs an adjustment – make the change.
Afterall, it’s your year.